Substance of Memories

A recent "Ask Marilyn" column featured a question about whether or not a person who had traumatic or painful memories could be hypnotized to forget those memories. vos Savant (nee Mach) wrote that this would not be possible because "memories are chemical, meaning they have substance." 

She said a person who was susceptible to hypnotism could "... respond to the suggestion to 'forget' certain events... but this action simply prevents them from being able to recall all the episodes. The memory itself still exists in their brains, and so does the aftermath and the many relevant associations... The result is that the people still feel bad but cannot recall why."

Although I've never been hypnotized, I have put many painful memories way, way back in my mind because I don't enjoy the feelings they bring when I do recall them. I've chosen to work around them, to bypass them and yes, stuff them.  

When vos Savant asks  "how would the long-term ramifications of the event[s] throughout one's life be eliminated [by hypnotism], anyway? ...After all, they never left; they were just inaccessible" and "when the hypnotist's suggestion to forget is withdrawn, all the memories return." 

What I realized after reading this column is that I do often "feel bad, but can't recall why." Is this the result of stuffing those things I would rather not remember or think about? 

Maybe I don't want to erase painful memories--at times they have been the impetus for me to adjust parts of my life for the better. However, I would rather not dwell on them because some cause me to chastise and berate myself for things I can no longer reverse--my own long-past errors, omissions and indiscretions.

I have hundreds of wonderful, exciting and loving memories; those are the ones I purposely focus on, the ones that feed my soul and remind me how very fortunate I am.  

           Memories warm you up from the inside. But they also tear you apart.

~Haruki Murakami, Kafka on the Shore